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I feel safe with you

 I once had a friend like this, not so very long ago.
Once he just came over ex tempore very late in the evening... We both had gone through something very deep, he never talked about his pain but I'd felt it and understood.
As words were not necessary they came as a natural flow. We consoled and carried each other through that very dark and lonely moment.

A precious memory in my heart is when he told me: 'I feel safe with you. I can tell you things I've never shared with anybody'. It meant so much to me.

So we lay there on my bed, emotionally so close, holding hands. Cried some, laughed some.  Remembered and shared so much. A lot of the time we just stayed in the moment not needing any words.

And, just to mention to people who don't know me, or the man who I’m talking about, he is the most loving, loyal and dedicated husband to someone I know - this was an emotional connection warmly accepted by his wife. As such, invaluable.

We weren't napping together but I'd say it was as close to this quote as it gets.

I will miss you my friend. The children will miss you too. 

But that's life and so it goes sometimes It's all okay. You were and will remain important to my little family. 

Having said that. You carried me when I had absolutely no strength to carry myself. 

Remember how my whole body shook at Kalle's funeral? I would have literally fallen if you and Annika hadn't held me from both sides. That hard wooden bench...

Beyond that worst day of my life. you alone came with me to face a person and a situation overwhelmingly cruel. I simply could not have gone through that alone. You held me physically together as I collapsed, cried, you held my hand and then you held me, and pulled me through even that. So many final farewells, on so many levels.

But you were there. Not one person of my family was, you were.

I don't forget.

Be it whatever, goodbyes as it is, just know you always have my love.

And if you ever need anything, me and my boys are always here for you.

You know I speak from the heart.

~*♥*~

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Helsinki Street Style - with a LadyBohemian Touch

We decided to play with the LadyBohemia collection to find Autumn wear inspiration - something warm, yet uncompromisingly feminine and elegant as always <3.

At times, you just have to stop and smell the flowers... I love having this traditional over a100-year old flower shop Ölander just next to LadyBohemia so we're always surrounded by a sea of flowers.
Even in Helsinki, it's possible to add a little Paris into your look. 
This gorgeous velvet jacket is one of my favorite finds for this Autumn. The handmade embroidery and bead work is absolutely exquisite, the jacket alone is like a chic jewel.

This jacket is a unique piece, you can find it at our shop on Korkeavuorenkatu, or from our webshop: 
https://ladybohemiashop.com/products/magical-velvet-jacket-of-a-thousand-and-one-nights
You can add warmth with a shawl or scarf... We have plenty of colors in wool/cashmir shawls, prices starting at 30e - I stumbled upon a brilliant showroon closing sale and brought home every color I found <3. 

The jacket itself is a rare dreamy shade of amethyst
In my opinion, this is as classy as Helsinki street wear gets. 
Warm welcome to check out this, and our other ideas for Autumn! Even the coffee machine works now - thanks to Oona - so we also offer good coffee and great company to warm up a cool day. 

Model: Oona Elena Kassila
Photography: Kaisu Haumont
Clothes: LadyBohemia Boutique
 
 

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Elegance in Warmness

It's a challenge to find something warm yet feminine if you don't want to go  the Michelin man way. So we've gathered some ideas. 
This beautiful cape is perfect for those crisp Autumn days. And for first snow and even more crispness, you can hide a warm leather jacket or a thick pullover under... A big wool  scarf will also be cozy...
The thing about this cape is that it's wide enough to wear just about anything underneath, yet so well tailored that it looks slim and beautifully emphasizes the feminine figure. 
I oftentimes get requests for bigger sizes and this time I really found plenty of lovely things that fit any size. 
These are again unique pieces, I got one cape in soft brown and one in grey, you can find them at the store on Korkeavuorenkatu 2 in Helsinki, or at our webshop: 
https://ladybohemiashop.com/products/cape-of-elegance

For more Autumn ideas, do drop by at the store, or at the webshop - I'll try to find time to add something new every day <3.
Model: Oona Elena Kassila
Photography; Kaisu Haumont
Clothing: LadyBohemia Boutique

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Maman are you being bullied?

Today my son looked at me straight in the eye and asked:
'Maman are you being bullied?'
 
This question almost knocked me off my feet. It is one for a parent to pose on a child. Not vice versa.
 
I could never have estimated my son had understood and suffered, in addition to everything else, from this. He really had enough on his plate already - we all have.
 
A person sometimes falls into a pattern where it's easy to spot who is vulnerable and doesn't have the don't mess with me -vibe about them. Especially if the destroying of one's self worth has started early on in childhood. There are people, like sharks, who smell blood. 
I've been told by several people, over decades, that if they should pick one person out of a crowd to harass, they would go after me. All these people have been friends, saying this out of love and kindness, encouraging me to acknowledge and DO SOMETHING about this.
 
Because of my own past, I have always been extra concerned about any emotional or physical bullying regarding my children. Unfortunately, I've apparently passed this sensitivity on to them.

I hadn't mentioned a word about any of this at home, yet here was my son looking at me with such deep sadness and helplessness in his eyes. He'd even realized who these people are. 'X, isn't it? XX also? XXX too? He knows them - had even trusted some of them. This was too much. He could no longer fight off his tears.

He asked for honesty. 'Maman, is this only you, or are they mean about Kalle too? I choked, not one word came out. I don't lie to my children but now I did my damnest to at least save him from this cruelest of blows. He loved Kalle too much to know this, Kalle had surrounded  us with a warm blanket of love so deep, we were family.  Nothing helped, he understood. I watched his heart break right there in front of me.
 
I will never have anything to do with people who disrespect Kalle.

He deserves to rest in peace. Period.

He is no longer here to stand up for himself but me and my boys will forever defend him. Even my little son already had to do so. 
 
I will survive. A mother has no choice. But my child. Wasn't he already hurting enough???? Really, this too?
 
An additional ps. Just as I was thinking about all this, and whether to publish it,  a person sitting next to me started a conversation with me - offering an observation that I had an aura of somebody who had really been hurt.
I've written this before, but it's time to repeat it. I asked my Kalle why, after 10 years alone, did he take such an interest in me when we first accidentally met.
He answered 'You were the saddest looking woman I'd ever seen'.
Poignant, no?