A lesson learned at a yoga workshop yesterday.
My dear readers, I would love to share with you my experience of a full-day yoga workshop, held by a beautiful soul, the yogi Jack Boken. Although Jack had promised this would be a truly heart-opening experience, little did I know.
That morning I went to class feeling totally overwhelmed by the world, my mind in chaos, so sad. So much so that when Jack asked us one simple question
"What has brought you here today?", the tears just came and drowned me. During the rest of that day, I never managed to gather my poise but that's just the beauty of yoga... Nobody's poised and we're not meant to be. People somehow find the strength to be honest and raw, compassionate and present. And during that day, with Jack's gentle guidance, we confided in each other on a such a true and real level, only to be welcomed by acceptance and compassion.
And later when the asanas got sweaty & physical, our bodies were as open as our minds.
Breakthroughs just happened.
For my part, I actually managed not one but five asanas I'd never dared to do before.
Like I pointed out in class, it was a very small step for mankind but a significant one for me - and especially so on a day that had begun with uncontrollable tears and feeling so blocked inside that I'd thought it would be better to give everybody else a break, and go calm down alone at home.
At the end of his classes, Jack asks each student to decide to give up something in their lives, and to commit to something.
Very concrete, very practical, very useful.
This can be something evoked during that specific practice, or anything that feels important. Key is commitment. Not just thinking how I'd like to be a better person but deciding exactly how I could achieve that.
Personally, I realised very, very, painfully clearly that I need to give up the fears that control and limit my life on so many levels. Or, to put it in yoga terminology, acknowledge the existence of my fears, and then let them go ;). This was why during this very practice, it had been so important for me to battle and conquer my fears of handstands, headstands and other stands I'd never done before and the names of which I don't even know. To trust Jack not to let me fall flat on my face and get hurt.
No, to just trust myself, no matter how much I was afraid, no matter how I was sure I COULD NEVER EVER DO IT.
Sooooooo liberating.
And if you can kick ass with your fears on the yoga mat, maybe in real life, you can too.
Only, in Jack's class we're not allowed any maybes.
There's no trying.
That's why I'm still, a weeks on...
Letting. It. All. Just. Be.
With such peace.
~*♥*~