My Joël turned 16 yesterday, and is graduating from secondary school. An end of an era, a new beginning... Reflection time.
(I am strictly forbidden from photographing him anymore, but here he was 1 year old. And not much has changed between us other than our ages)
Their teacher asked the parents to describe their kids with three qualities we find beautiful in them, something for their friends to remember them by now as everybody leaves towards their different directions. Deep in my thoughts I was walking down our street, trying to put in words what I appreciate most in my so very grown up son.
Somebody called my name from across the street. Joël's class friend whom I've known since he was little. He came to hug me and we chatted about the future, his plans from now on... Suddenly he got a little pensive.
- Kaisu I think there's something you should know about how Joël is at school. I don't think he'll tell you but you should know...
Me heart sank. What? What could he not tell me?
- Well there's a new guy there who has lived abroad and he doesn't speak such good Finnish. He gets laughed at... He's alone a lot. So, in the Finnish class Joël always goes to sit next to him and helps him out although they don't know each other. And Joël doesn't like praising himself so I don't think he'd tell you anything... But I knew you'd want to know.
This friend of Joël's knows I'm very strongly against bullying at school. With him, and with my sons we've discussed our own experiences with bullying. Theirs, those of other kids' at their school. My own also.
Sooooooo sweet of him to understand how much hearing this about my Joël meant to me.
At home, I carefully tried to compliment Joël about this... And ask why he hadn't mentioned anything to me.
My teenager turned to his guitar and concentrated on the sweet sounds of Children of Bodom.
Me: Okay... But tell me why you've never mentioned this guy? Don't you feel you can talk to me?
Joël: Yeah I can tell you everything but you just get so poetic about whatever Luca or I do...
True that. I am their Mother and I reserve the prerogative to feel poetic and proud whenever there's reason to be so. Unfortunately for my boys, that is pretty much every day.
So, instead of three, I narrowed down what I want to say about Joël's character into this one thing. If there is something I would like his classmates to remember him by it is all the times he went to sit next to this guy who was alone and needed a little help.
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